Stop Setting Hard Deadlines and Enjoy Your Way To Your Goals

Happy New Year!

For those of you who missed my previous blog on pushing less and trusting more, here is a very similar article on reaching your goals. Enjoy the read and may 2016 treat you well.

Stop Setting Hard Deadlines and Enjoy Your Way To Your Goals  

Push Less and Trust More: The Stress-Free Path to Your Goals

As we wind down from 2015 and enter into 2016 we may be beginning to formulate our New Year’s resolutions and set our goals for the year ahead.

I believe that making resolutions and goal setting can sometimes be counterproductive as it asks us to hold ourselves accountable to forces outside our control. If we do not achieve our goals or keep to our resolutions we may consider ourselves a failure.

We cannot predict whether our actions towards a goal will produce a desired outcome – there can be ‘unintended consequences’. So sometimes we just need to take small exploratory steps that will produce a change of some sort – either towards our preferred future or not. We may find that something new, something unexpected and every now and then something fantastic may happen.

Unlike a goal, a small step is not something to achieve or fail to achieve – it is just something that one takes or not.

In the article below Ash Blankenship writes about letting go of our desires and changing our attitude to allow us to become more receptive to life’s greatness.

Push Less and Trust More: The Stress-Free Path to Your Goals

What it means to ‘Hold Space’

What does it mean to hold space for someone else? It means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. When we hold space for other people, we open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgement and control.

In her article, Heather Plett gives eight tips on how to ‘hold space’ well. Holding Space is something that all of us can do for each other – for our partners, parents, children, friends, neighbours and even strangers. All of us need to know that there are people in our life with whom we can be vulnerable and weak without fear of being judged.

Empowering our Youth

“The route through childhood is shaped by many forces, and it differs for each of us. Our biological inheritance, the temperament with which we are born, the care we receive, our family relationships, the place where we grow up, the schools we attend, the culture in which we participate, and the historical period in which we live–all these affect the paths we take through childhood and condition the remainder of our lives.” Robert Wozniak

I have just witnessed the graduation of 189 young men aged between 18 and 25 from Chrysalis Academy. Chrysalis Academy is an initiative of the Western Cape Provincial Cabinet, established in 2000 at Porter Estate, Tokai. Its founding was a response by the Provincial Government to the high crime rate in the Western Cape, which is one of the highest among the provinces in South Africa, especially due to substance abuse and an active gang culture in Cape Town’s mainly disadvantaged communities. Some of the young men come into the program having very little awareness and consciousness of their choices in life, but after the initial 3 month live-in empowerment training that focuses on the individual’s physical, emotional, mental, energetic and spiritual development they are able to understand and apply Dr Wayne Dyers quote:

“Everything you do is based on the choices you make. It’s not your parents, your past relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, an argument or your age that is to blame. You and only you are responsible for every decision and choice you make. Period.”

The message the CEO sent them home with when they left the safe environment of Chrysalis Academy was – ‘To all our graduates and their families – we must remember that individual transformation is a lifelong journey of rediscovery which requires perseverance, patience and compassion and we must be sufficiently brave to embark on this journey and navigate the stormy waters that we will all encounter in our lives.’

I salute Chrysalis Academy for the wonderful work they are doing! For more information on Chrysalis Academy go to http://chrysalisacademy.org.za/